“Beauty” is a word that I probably throw around way too much. And now that I have a daughter of my own who watches my every move and soaks each in like a sponge, I have to be careful to use just the right words to instill self confidence in her, and to make her feel beautiful.
Each morning she intensely watches me as I spread out all of my makeup and products on the counter. I go about my routine, the one I’m confident I could complete with my eyes closed, and most of the time I don’t think much more about those little eyes on me. We banter back and forth. Sometimes she asks for a little powder on her nose and I oblige.
I know that she’s watching me do a little more than put makeup on and tease and spray my hair. When her little eyes are on me I carry myself a little differently. I don’t think twice about that blemish or the way my hair doesn’t curl just right on the left side.
Why? Because every single time I get ready, my daughter always compliments me. Somewhere near the end of my routine she throws out some nice words about my appearance.
“You got pretty long hairs.”
“You so pretty, Mommy.”
And I know this: she means what she says. Just ask her if she wants to share her ice cream with you. Just try to make her wear a pink bow when she thinks only purple will match. You’ll know when this little girl says what she means.
It’s funny that her words do what nothing else can do. They strip away every single doubt I have about the way I look. They make me feel beautiful. I can see it in her eyes and I know that she believes every word that she is saying. Her face lights up when she sees me. Nothing else comes close to the beauty I see reflected in her eyes when she looks at me and gives me a sweet compliment, not the hundreds of dollars in beauty products strewn about my bathroom, not the over-processed, blonder-than-nature-intended hair, or the expensive clothes, jewelry or shoes.
It’s much more than that, priceless and unexplainable. She doesn’t understand self-esteem issues and she’s never been picked on. She is unbiased, she doesn’t judge and she has a fresh and innocent outlook on each person she sees. Many of us immediately judge when we see others. We ponder their outfit choices or immediately find some flaws. I wish I could take the feeling that she gives me with me all day. I would walk with confidence and forget about any flaws I might see. Her eyes are the perfect reflection of beauty in its truest form. She doesn’t understand imperfection.
I am beautiful to my daughter because I am her mother, her best friend, the one person she can count on to make things right — not a collection of physical attributes.
This post is part of BlogHer’s My Beautiful Moment editorial series, made possible by Olay.
This post is part of BlogHer’s My Beautiful Moment editorial series, made possible by Olay.
Shannon Dew says
Awe so true! Kendall sits in the bathroom with me while I get ready most days too and she’s started asking for make up and carries my brushes around. But I love that even when I have no make up and a pony tail she doesn’t notice a difference. She loves me no matter what, just the way I am.
annie_loo says
Jennifer! This is beautiful! JUST LIKE YOU! AND BK! What a sweet sweet post! I LOVE THIS!
Jessica says
What a sweet, sweet post. Brought tears to my eyes! The relationship that the two of you have – as mother and daughter – is so precious. I love the little tidbits that you share about Braylen’s personality. She seems like a hoot!
Janaya says
What a lovely post! Truly humbling and heartwarming.
Lisa @ Floating Along... says
Such a beautiful post!! I hope she can hang onto her sweetness for as long as possible – I wish we all could!
Carrie says
Nice as it may sound, if you completely honest you’d say that you’d like it to not matter if you had a blemish or an imperfect curl. Truth is, you know it does. You might not want it to, but it does. I have a daughter myself and I’d also love to say that I’m always on my best behavior around her and only show her the best in me. I try. Believe me, I do. I’m sure you do, too. But we all know that there have been times that you lose your cool about a blemish or imperfect curl just like the rest of us. Yes, I’m sure your daughter thinks you’re beautiful. She absolutely should. While you’re teaching to her the importance of self worth and self respect, she also needs to see honesty.
Jessica says
Absolutely beautiful post! Made me begin to cry as I think about my little 29 month girl!